anglosexual: misandryinhaiku: “women are weaklings!” i’m strong enough to carry your corpse to the woods this haiku is my favorite haiku
girlgrowingsmall: stop-bitching-start-a-revolution: Cosmo tip: When he pulls out his dick, perform the musical Put That Thing Back Where It Came From Or So Help Me
doomf: this video is the reason I am alive today
justasimplehoe: what are the symptoms of being fergalicious
unclefather: unclefather: at my funeral there is going to be a closed casket and then it will be opened to reveal that i am not inside. instead, they will turn on the ceiling fan and my lifeless body will swing around the room while the space jam theme song is playing in the background. nevermind, my mom says i can’t do that.
nue: i hate teachers who give homework over break like do u not understand what a break is do u want me to demonstrate on ur neck
elphabaforpresidentofgallifrey: fuckerpunch: i never realize how much i swear until i’m in a situation where i can’t
twistedviper: whorusszahhak: perfectionistdia: whorusszahhak: don’t ever take me on a date to an aquarium because i will ignore you and spend the whole time looking at the fish But, if you think about it, that’s all the more reason to go. The person you’re dating gets to sit back and watch you smile and have fun. All the while, he/she’s falling deeper in love with you. thatS REALLY...